英訳の問題なのですが自分であっているかわからないのでこれで通じますか?

1老人になっても寝込まないように若いうちから健康に気をつけなくちゃいけない

2フットボールは19世紀までは多くの有名なパブリックスクールでそれぞれの地域の規則に応じて行われていた

3野球はアメリカの国民的なスポーツのひとつである。多くのアメリカ人は子供のころ近所の野原で野球をして大きくなる

4現代の病気を治すには日本の伝統的な医療法が効果があるかもしれない

5彼女が金メダルを獲得したという知らせを聞いた瞬間喜びの涙が私の目にあふれた

1 I must care about my health from young for fear that I won't end up an invailid when I become old.

2 Football was played according to the rule of each country at many famous public school until 19th century.

3 Baseball is one of the national sports in America.Many Americans grow by playing baseball in near field while children.

4 Japanese traditional medical care may have an effect to cure modern diseases.

5 I wept with joy as soon as I heard the news that he got a gold medal.
たくさんあって申し訳ないですけどお願いします

A 回答 (4件)

>1 I must care about my health from young for fear that I won't end up an invailid when I become old.


一般人称の we, you を使った方がいいと思います。from young は、「前置詞+形容詞」になっているので、from a young age のほうがいいと思います。

> 2 Football was played according to the rule of each country at many famous public school until 19th century.
過去完了形のほうがいいと思います。

>3 Baseball is one of the national sports in America.Many Americans grow by playing baseball in near field while children.
by playing... では、「play することによって」のような意味に感じます。それより、「play しながら」くらいに感じられるほうがいいと思います。in near field は、field が無冠詞なので抽象的です。まだ、in a near field の方がいいと思います。 この文が、最も通じにくいのでは……。

>4 Japanese traditional medical care may have an effect to cure modern diseases.
通じるとは思いますが、抽象的なもの( care ) が、複数のもの( diseases ) を cure するのに、具体的な1つの effect を持つのが、なんとなくひっかかります。

>5 I wept with joy as soon as I heard the news that he got a gold medal.
通じると思います。

---拙訳---

1.
We, while young, have to take care of our health so as not to be bedridden even when we get older.

We have to take care of our health from a young age so that we won't be bedridden even when we get older.

2.
Until the 19th century, football had been played at lots of famous public schools under each local rule.

3.
Baseball is one of the national sports in the U.S.
Many Americans grow up playing it in nearby fields.

Baseball is one of the most popular sports in the U.S.
Many Americans spend their childhood playing it in neighboring fields.

4.
Japanese traditional health practices may be effective to cure modern diseases.

Japanese traditional medical practices may be effective against modern diseases.

5.
At the moment I heard the news she had won the gold medal, my eyes got filled with joyful tears.

My eyes got filled with joyful tears as I heard the news she won the gold medal.

以上、少しでもお役に立てたでしょうか?★
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(さらに訂正)


the news that he had gotten --> the news that he had won
のほうがベター。
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(訂正)


bedredden --> bedridden
public school --> public schools
a lot of children --> a lot of American children
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私はノンネイティブですが、私ならこういいます。


1 I must care about my health while I'm young so that I'm not going to be bedredden when I get old.
2 Fottball had been played at many famous public school on each rule of the country.
3 Baseball is one of the America's national sports. A lot of children grow, playing baseball in the neighboring fields.
4 Japanese traditional methods of medical treatment may have an effect to cure modern diseases.
5 I wept with joy the moment I heard the news that he had gotten a gold medal.
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