"We have to talk."
To women, usually the ones saying this to men, these four words are often an expression of a desire to connect, to address something with a man on a deeper, more satisfying level.
It often means, "Let's get together and see if we can move things to a better place." Saying this to a man can feel dangerous. As one woman put it "Get ready for World War Three" To men, these may be among the most feared words in the language. They often stimulate what we call male relational dread. One man's response was,"Let me out of here!" Another man said, "To me those words mean : `Next stop,divorce.`" These words often mean somethings quite different whwn they are said to someone ofthe same genger. When women say to other women,"We have to talk," it can mean a multitude of things.
If the other woman is someone new with whom the woman feels friendly, it can mean,"Let's get to know each other."
If it's an old friend whom she hasn't seen for a while, it can mean, "Let's catch up - do I have things to tell you!"
And if it is a friend with whom she is in frequent, even daily contact,it can mean,"Wait till you hear this. I've got to tell you about last night." Men rarely say this to other men. When they do, sometimes it has a sense of invitation, as in, "Hey, let's catch up!" But often it has the connotation of "You're in big trouble with me.Get ready for a hassle."
Gender differences in the meaning of these words start early. In our gender dialogues between seventh-grade boys and girls, their comments and questions often focus on "talk" :
BOYS: Girls talk for most of the conversation so we don't have to talk.
GIRLS: How come boys don't talk first?
How these gender differences can be used in dialogue to heal the relationships between women and men is the topic of our discussion.


A 回答 (1件)



※1:These words often mean somethings quite different [whwn] they are said to someone ofthe same [genger].
[ ]で示した単語二つは、typoだと思いましたので、whwn→when、genger→genderとして訳しました。
※2:In our gender dialogues
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